ZERO STARS/**** Image C Sound C
starring Erika Christensen, Mike Vogel, Katherine Heigl, Johnny Whitworth
screenplay by Max Enscoe & Annie De Young, based ever-so-loosely on the book by Emile Brontë
directed by Suri B. Krishnamma
by Walter Chaw Consider this time-capsule exchange from the horrifically-misguided mess Suri Krishnamma has made of Wuthering Heights and shudder:
"I swear to God if you ever leave me I'll kill you."
"Then I'd have to come back and kill you so we could be together."
"If you kill me then I'd haunt you. Forever."
How about I just kill myself while you two sort it out?