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June 20, 2013


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Walter’s a great essayist, but who knew he had a degree in advanced microbiology? Thus he debunks WWZ’s ending and saves us low-watt masses from interpreting it as it was intended, a lesson in finding creative solutions outside the box, or something like that. If only he protected us from the scientific incorrectness of so many other films: "Jurassic Park" (cloning dinosaurs through embalmed mosquitoes is preposterous), "Alien" (a mouth inside a mouth would choke it to death) and "Raiders of the Lost Ark.” (Closing your eyes does not protect your head from being exploded, shriveled, or melted by pissed-off angels. OBVIOUSLY.)

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