Alas, the title of the "True Crime" reviewed here belongs not to the Clint Eastwood movie released in cinemas a few weeks back but a 1995 Alicia Silverstone vehicle. As in "Crazy," her best Aerosmith video (and I know you've ranked them, too), Ms. Silverstone spends most of 1995's True Crime in a plaid skirt and white dress-shirt, her school uniform; though I will go on record as saying that any movie set, in whole or in part, at an all-girl institution has the potential for greatness, this one spends too little time ogling teenaged hotties and too much time on a textbook mystery plot and other silliness. Now that's a true crime.

Silverstone plays a professed virgin named--I'm not kidding--Mary whose obsession with the killing of a classmate has her conducting a private investigation, much to the chagrin of the cop friend (Bill Nunn) of her late father. Enter Tony Campbell (Kevin Dillon), a police cadet eager to impress his future superiors by cracking the case himself. He and Nancy Drew find each other and exchange information, not to mention--you knew this was coming--bodily fluids. (Her deflowering scene is one of the creepiest since Jennifer Jason Leigh's first sexual encounter in Fast Times at Ridgemont High.) Things get complicated when Mary concludes, as I did the first time I laid eyes on him and most people over the age of seven would, that Tony might be the killer.

Physically, Kevin Dillon resembles his brother Matt--if one were to put Matt's face through the mill of "Kai's PowerGoo." He speaks in dumb-thug tones (all too stereotypical of tough characters named Tony) that appear to be natural, not a put-on. I actually enjoyed True Crime until the irredeemably unappealing Dillon entered it. (An engaging subplot about Mary's troubled family all but vanishes upon his appearance.)

In a sense, his relationship with Mary is entirely plausible: teenaged girls always fall for dickheads. But watching the downward spiral of such an affair is never a pleasant experience, in the movies or in life. Hack director Pat Verducci needs the "love story" of Mary and Tony to pad out his narrative, True Crime's big puzzle being so thin and simple-minded that the film could have ended as satisfactorily as it actually does at the thirty-minute mark. Were it not for the profanity and intense violence (which either Dillon, Verducci or both seem to get off on), I'd mistake it for an overlong ABC Afterschool Special.

True Crime is presented on DVD by Trimark in a fullscreen rendering. The image is actually very nice--only occasional white speckling distracts from the high quality of the transfer. A superb level of detail is maintained in this presentation, from scenes with intense sunlight to those staged in the catacombs of the local fairground. (Don't ask.) The audio, on the other hand, is atrocious. Mislabelled "Dolby Surround," the sound is spread thin between the front left and front right channels. The actors' voices have a tinny quality besides, and the effects are recorded too loud in comparison to the dialogue. Trimark has included a trailer for True Crime (which contains several shots not in the finished film) in addition to cool previews of The Doom Generation, Love & A .45, and The Ugly. The best thing about this disc is its (full-motion) magnifying-glass menu, but its novelty wears off after an initial go-round.-Bill Chambers